Mental Wellbeing

Anxiety is when you feel scared, worried, or panicked.
It is a normal feeling and your body’s natural response to stress or danger.
Anyone can experience anxiety.

We all feel anxious from time to time.
Everyday things like friendships, money, exams, or work can make us anxious.
Certain situations, like starting a new school or travelling home at night, can also cause anxiety.
Usually, the feeling passes when we feel safe or solve the problem.

Anxiety becomes a problem when it lasts a long time.
You might feel stuck in your worries, even after a stressful situation is over.
You may feel overwhelmed or unable to do everyday tasks.

Anxiety in autism explained

Many autistic people experience anxiety.
Changes, sensory overload, or new situations can make these feelings stronger.
Understanding triggers and using calm routines can help.

It is normal to feel worried about exams.
Pressure from school, family, or yourself can make stress feel worse.

Exam stress can affect:

• sleep

• appetite

• energy levels

• mood

There are strategies that can help, such as:

• planning small revision steps

• taking breaks

• talking to a trusted adult

• using relaxation techniques

Self‑control means being able to manage your actions, emotions, and impulses.
It helps you avoid behaviour you do not want, choose behaviour you do want, and work towards long‑term goals.

Self‑control is important for both physical and mental wellbeing.

Types of self-control

There are three main types:

1. Impulse control

This is the ability to manage urges.
People who struggle with this may act quickly without thinking.

2. Emotional control

This means managing emotional reactions.
People who find this difficult may overreact, stay upset for a long time, or feel overwhelmed.

3. Movement control

This is the ability to control body movements.
Someone who struggles with this may feel restless or find it hard to sit still.

What self‑control looks like

A person with self‑control:

• thinks before acting

• manages their emotions

• stays focused on goals

• makes choices that support their wellbeing

Examples of self‑control

Self‑control can show up in everyday life. For example:

• avoiding social media at school or college so you can concentrate

• sticking to a budget and not buying something you want

• choosing not to eat too many sugary treats

• calming yourself when someone upsets you

Delaying gratification means waiting for something you want.
It is an important part of self‑control.
It helps you make choices that are good for you in the long term.

For example:
You may want to buy an expensive console game.
To save up, you might spend less money on going out with friends.
You are still making a fun choice, but you are thinking ahead.

Delaying gratification means choosing long‑term rewards over short‑term pleasures.
Research shows this skill helps you reach goals and can improve your wellbeing.

There are two systems that affect self‑control:

The hot system

This part of your brain is emotional.
It reacts quickly and pushes you to act on your urges.
When this system takes over, you may make choices without thinking about the long‑term effects.

The cool system

This part of your brain is calm and logical.
It helps you think before acting.
It lets you notice consequences and distract yourself from urges.
This system helps you make safer, healthier choices.

Both systems are normal.
Practising self‑control helps the cool system stay in charge more often.

Online gaming can be fun.
But it can also be easy to play for too long.
It is important to take breaks and notice how gaming affects your life.

Signs gaming may be becoming a problem

You might need support if:

• you stop seeing friends or spending time with family

• you lie about how long you are gaming

• you choose gaming over homework, and this causes trouble at school

• gaming is the first thing you think about when you wake up

• you stay up late gaming and feel tired during the day

• you get angry, frustrated, or anxious when you cannot play

• you spend money in the game and feel unable to stop buying things like bonus packs or loot boxes

If you notice these signs, talk to a trusted adult.
There are ways to get support and create a healthier balance.

Abuse is when someone uses power to control you or make you do things you do not want to do.
It can hurt you emotionally or physically.

Sexual abuse includes being touched, kissed, or forced to have sex when you do not want to.
It is often done by someone older or someone who has power over you.
Abuse is never your fault.

Body image is how you think and feel about your body, and how you believe others see you.
You may like your body at some times and struggle with it at others.
This is normal.

Lots of things can affect body image, such as:

• social media

• friends

• family

• clothes

• health changes

• puberty

If negative thoughts become overwhelming, talk to someone you trust.

Bullying is when someone hurts you on purpose.
This can include:

• physical harm

• verbal abuse

• threats

• repeated unkind behaviour

Bullying can happen once or many times.
It can happen to anyone.
If you are being bullied, reach out for support. You are not alone.

The Covid‑19 pandemic was difficult for everyone.
We all experienced big changes, such as:

• isolation rules

• lockdowns

• restrictions

• shielding

• working or learning from home

These changes affected how many people think and feel.
Feeling worried, stressed, or tired during or after the pandemic is normal.

Drugs and alcohol affect people differently.
The impact depends on:

• the type of drug

• how much you take

• how often you take it

• how you are feeling

• where you are when you take it

Some drugs, such as alcohol, may make you feel relaxed for a short time.
But these effects do not last.
They can make anxiety or depression worse later.
They can also harm your physical health.

Regular drug or alcohol use can lead to addiction.
This is when you feel the drug is controlling you.
Your life may start to revolve around getting or using the substance.

Using drugs or alcohol over time can:

• worsen mental health problems

• create new mental health problems

• affect your sleep, memory, and mood

• lead to conditions such as psychosis (linked to regular cannabis use)

Alcohol and pregnancy

Drinking alcohol during pregnancy can harm the baby.
It can cause Foetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD).
A baby cannot process alcohol.
Alcohol can stay in their body and:

• damage their brain and body

• affect their growth

• stop healthy development

• lead to pregnancy loss

Babies who survive may have lifelong challenges.

Self‑harm is when someone hurts their body on purpose to cope with difficult feelings.
These feelings can come in strong, fast waves.

About the Calm Harm app

The Calm Harm app helps people move through the urge to self‑harm.
It offers activities in different categories:

• Comfort

• Distract

• Express yourself

• Release

• Random

These activities can help you “ride the wave” of strong feelings until the urge passes.

Support is always available. Self‑harm is a sign you need help, not something to face alone.

Losing someone important to you is one of the hardest things anyone can go through.
For children and young people, it can feel even more difficult.
There is support available, and you do not have to cope alone.

The teenage years can already be emotional and confusing.
If someone close to you dies, it may feel like your whole world has changed.
You may feel very alone, especially if your friends have not experienced anything similar and are not sure how to help.

Your emotions after a bereavement

Grief is a natural response to losing someone.
Everyone experiences grief differently.
There are no rules about what you should feel or how long you should feel it.

Many people experience a mix of feelings, such as:

• sadness

• shock (especially if the death was sudden)

• relief (if the person had been very ill)

• guilt or regret

• anger

• anxiety

• despair or helplessness

• depression

These feelings can be very strong at first.
Over time, they usually become less intense.
It is okay to start feeling better.
It does not mean you are forgetting the person or disrespecting their memory.

Your family members may all react differently.
It can be hard to see adults grieving and not know what to say.
Letting each other know you are there can help everyone cope.

Looking after your health and talking to someone you trust can help you manage this difficult time.

More information and support

You can find more help, advice, and support here:

• NHS – Bereavement and young people
  

• YoungMinds – Grief and loss
  

• YoungMinds – Support for young people
  

• YoungMinds – Coping with life
  

• NHS – Mental health support for children and young people
  

• NHS Every Mind Matters – Mental wellbeing tips