Teenage Zone

Teenage Zone

Having an autistic sibling

Having an autistic brother or sister can be a positive experience. They may share their own unique way of seeing the world. This can help you become more understanding and accepting of others. But it can also feel stressful at times.

You might feel that your autistic sibling does not get told off as much as you do, or that your parents give them more attention. This can make you feel angry, sad, jealous, frustrated or confused. These feelings are normal.

Bridget shares her experience

“Even now I still find it hard to deal with. I'm a lot more patient with my sister than I used to be, and I'm trying to be a better sibling to her. I sometimes slip and get into a bad mood – but hey, I can't be perfect all the time. I'm still getting used to the whole concept of autism, and I don't really understand all about it.”

Understanding your parents

It is important to remember that your parents do not love you any less. You may need less support than your autistic sibling. Your parents may trust you to do things on your own.

If you can, talk to your parents about how you feel. If speaking face‑to‑face feels hard, you could send a text or email. They may be able to plan some one‑to‑one time with you.

If you cannot talk to your parents, speak to someone else you trust. This could be a teacher, a friend or a helpline.

Thinking about the future

You might worry about the future care needs of your autistic sibling, especially if they need a lot of support. You may wonder what will happen when your parents can no longer care for them in the same way.

It can help to talk about this as a family. Your sibling should be included if possible, using the type of communication that works best for them. This might include pictures, objects, or clear written words.

Together, you might think about questions such as:

• Will your sibling be able to live independently?

• Would supported living or residential care be better for them?

• What kind of support would help them feel safe and happy?

You may also want to help your sibling with things like:

• finding a job

• managing money

• choosing a college or university

• learning to advocate for themselves (which means speaking up for what they need)

Thinking about these things now can help with long‑term planning.

Extra support

National Autistic Society sibling information
https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/family-life-and-relationships/family-life/siblings

Sibs – support for siblings of disabled children
https://www.sibs.org.uk/youngsibs/